Mars Venus
Most of you have probably heard of the book Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus – written by Dr. John Gray some 15 years ago... It’s now such a well known phrase that even if we don’t fully understand the concepts, most of us know the inference behind the phrase ‘Mars Venus’. But for several years before this book was written many felt it was improper to discuss gender differences... Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus fed this oppressed need and its enormous and global success reflects the desire that men and women want to learn more about each other.
And so the Mars Venus philosophy was born.
John Gray's paradigm of two separate, equal, but very different species - who misunderstand each other endlessly as they try to bond/coexist – is something that resonates with so many different people; regardless of planets!
The approach does not set out to prove one sex is better than the other - merely that both sexes are different; despite modern society and political correctness trying to suggest that we are more similar than we really are. Initially, some of the Mars Venus points of view may sound like gender stereotypes - then when we delve a little deeper we find there is the compelling explanation of why we behave in this way based on the latest scientific research into the brain. I know some people think this is tosh and nonsense but I’ve double sourced a lot of the more scientific Mars Venus philosophies and they invariably point to the same results; in fact I recently read in a book (that wasn’t a Mars Venus one) that it will take evolution a million years to catch up with modem society!
Of course we’re all different and I’m not suggesting that we all neatly fit into particular categories; John Gray points out that it is possible for any male or female to be made up of a mixture of male and female traits, and he advises you to make the decision yourself as to whether you feel you posses the male or female traits. The Mars Venus perspective does not tell you what you are, nor does it force you into either category - rather it asks you to make the decision yourself based on how you feel; and learning this about yourself is invaluable.
The other important thing to note when contemplating the Mars Venus philosophies is that you don’t necessarily have agree with it 100%. I’m obviously a huge advocate of the Mars Venus way of thinking and I still sometimes hear or read certain points and think ‘nope, that one doesn’t relate’ – and that’s OK – take the bits that work for you and leave behind the bits that don’t... as isn’t it better to glean some useful information than none at all?
Also, keep in mind that of course some of the things that women need, men need too – and vice versa – but with an awareness that something may be ten times more important to a woman than to a man, we can then begin to understand when something feels like an overreaction to us; because in our minds it is an overreaction – because it only feels a tenth as important to us as it feels to them!
That why the Mars Venus approaches brilliantly created the captivating concept of the coexisting male and female planets of behaviour. Women are Venusians, and men are Martians. We all laugh and joke about it, but never truly understand it. The Mars Venus philosophy is relayed in a way we can all relate; meaning it’s not only informative, but entertaining too!